No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Randomize
