It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize