No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Randomize
