Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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