I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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