i need an iv and a liver transplant
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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