Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
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