I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize