Christians are straight up FREAKS
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
how do flat chested girls get laid?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
