dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I need to stop coming to work sober
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
