We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
