it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
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He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
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you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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