Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize