You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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