no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
