I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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