Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
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