I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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