My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
