try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
