They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize