if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
