he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
