My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
