You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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