She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
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