having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize