Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
