"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
