Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I will die if light touches me.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize