You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
My cat gives me a boner
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
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