she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize