Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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