I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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