whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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