wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
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Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
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