i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
