This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
