There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
it was like having sex with a tree stump
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
