I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
wow bdsm is so cute
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
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