so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
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