okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
