her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
