TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
