they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
