Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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