Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
