So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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