I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
wow bdsm is so cute
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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