Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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