U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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