it hurts more in the daytime
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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