i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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